Moving

I need to comment on the amount of help we had with our recent move. Our friends need to know how grateful we are for them and how amazing they are. We feel very fortunate to have so many people willing to help us with such an undertaking.

We closed on our old home in early April but negotiated a rent-back period so we could stay in the home until we finalized the purchase of the new house. By late April we had closed on the new house and were ready to move. We figured we would move most of the boxes piecemeal throughout the week and then enlist the help of friends and U-haul to get the big stuff on a Saturday.

As the week started several family members and ladies from the ward brought their SUVs and mini-vans and started loading up boxes and whatever they could fit to take to the new house. They made many, many trips, and there were many who didn't help with the physical move but did volunteer to watch the kids so they wouldn't be underfoot while the move was ongoing. By the time Wednesday rolled around a huge portion of the smaller things had already been taken care of.

At this point we were nervous because the weather forecast was calling for very cold temperatures and lots of rain on Saturday. So, I called up U-haul and switched the rental to that evening. I sent out an email asking friends and family if they would be able to help that evening on such short notice. Later that afternoon the trucks started arriving. I was still working and people were already loading up couches and bookshelves and whatever they could get their hands on and taking it to the new place. By the time I was ready to pitch in, it was suggested that a U-haul would not be necessary. We had enough trucks and people that we could probably handle everything in one or two more trips. It would take more time to go over and pick up the U-haul and bring it back than it was worth.

So, everyone redoubled their efforts and put their shoulders into the work and before we knew it the house was virtually empty. Everyone simply made their way over to the other house and unloaded there as well. People came after they got off work and helped move things from the garage into the new house. Other people called later in the evening anxious to come and help, and I had to tell them there was not really anything for them to do. It was absolutely amazing how much was done in such a short space of time. Over the next few days I told several people that I, personally, probably moved fewer items during this move than I had on several of the moves I had previously helped other people with. And I don't believe I was exaggerating when I said that.

We had a few more loads to make over the next several days, and we were even able to do a lot of work on that Saturday (the forecast of apocalyptic weather turned out to be greatly overblown!). In the end I did manage to do quite a bit of work on the move, but I have to offer my complete gratitude to the many, many people who came to my family's aid and helped. My sisters, my niece and so many ward members that I'm really not sure what the count of people who helped might be. I would speculate that it was probably in the thirties somewhere by the time you consider everyone who helped in the early part of the week and on the Wednesday. Simply remarkable. We love the people who are part of our lives, and we will miss mightily the ward we are leaving. Eliza's middle name is McKay for a very real reason. That ward family has taken care of us on more than one occasion. So, thanks everyone! We love you, and we are exceedingly grateful for your service and love. We're also grateful that we're only a few miles away so we can all still hang out. Now we get to make new friends and enjoy a new ward while still maintaining the ties and friendships we've been fortunate to build over the past eight years. It almost feels like we're cheating to be so lucky! Life is good.

Long Time

Clearly blogging has not been high on my priority list for the last few months.  No real reason, my interest just waxes and wanes.  Given that it has just waned for several months let's hope some good waxing is on the way!

A few things actually compel me to record some thoughts this evening.  First, the inauguration of Barack Obama and second, some changes at church.

I may as well say up front that I did not vote for Obama, but I was not unhappy that he won the election.  And, as I have watched events since election night it seems to me that his presence in the White House may be able to bring this country together in way that hasn't happened since 9/11.  Trying times tend to focus our energies and attentions--just as 9/11 did.  Now, again, we are faced with trying times and Obama has a singular opportunity to take advantage of the nation's collective attention.  When the people get behind a president, the president can make things happen.  The question is whether they are the right things.  And, honestly, it's pretty close to impossible to know in the heat of the moment when something is right from a historical perspective.  Obama has my attention and my admiration.  I hope he will also have my long-term gratitude.

The inauguration itself was beautiful, in my opinion.  I've spent my share of time on the National Mall in DC, and it was simply stunning to see so many people gathered there today.  I loved the camera shots that looked out from the Capitol across the reflecting pond to the Washington Monument and all the way to the Lincoln Memorial.  All of it covered in people.  In Americans there to participate in history and to show support for our new president.  That by itself was very impressive.  Add to that spectacle the significance of the event and the grandeur of the ceremony, and it was a great day, indeed, to be an American.  

I loved Aretha Franklin's "My Country 'Tis of Thee," and the subtle nod she gave to MLK with her quiet inclusion of references to Georgia and Alabama at the end.  I particularly loved the quartet performing John Williams's arrangement of Copeland's Appalachian Spring.  I was struck as much by the composition of the quartet as by the composition itself.  A Jew, an Asian, an African American and a woman combined to elicit from me a sense of wonder and joy based on the music they created.  I thought it was a fantastic tribute both in song and in appearance to what is possible.

I even enjoyed Justice Roberts's bungling of the administration of the Oath.  It simply made it feel more real and memorable.  Then came the speech, which was fantastic as is par for the course with Obama.  I'm really glad that he called us all out and basically said we were lazy and that the blame for the mortgage and financial meltdown belongs with all of us.  We all contributed to this society that idolizes greed and carelessness.  In fact those who were able to combine greed and carelessness often seemed to get most of the public's adoration.  With the mortgage benders so many of us went on simply because we could (never mind whether we should) we all contributed.  Now is our chance to show ourselves worthy to be called the descendants of our parents and grandparents and restore to our economy and this country the dignity and strength which have simply been taken for granted as a birthright for too long.  Yes, the speech stirred something in me as I had imagined it would.

Most of all I enjoyed the moment--I believe it was during the quartet--that showed Obama from behind and above as he sat looking over the assemblage.  Truthfully a tear ran down my cheek as I thought to myself, "I hope he can deliver on all of this goodwill.  I hope he can achieve those things he has set before us all."  I hope we can all work together to effect the change that he champions.

Along with 9/11 this may be the seminal American event in my lifetime to date.

I suppose that is enough on today's events.  Now to something more personal.  Given that I no longer attempt to keep a written journal anywhere but here, I feel compelled to record some feelings about the experiences I have had for nearly the past five years.  

In May 2004 I was called to serve in the bishopric of our ward.  I was very humbled by such a calling and felt wholly inadequate.  I'm guessing many of you can relate to those feelings--not unique or unusual.  It didn't take me long to realize what a tremendous trust individuals and families place in bishopric members.  Before being in the bishopric I would sit in the congregation with my family and look at the people around me and assume their lives were wonderful.  Sitting on the stand provides a completely different perspective.  I learned of people's struggles that I would never have been able to guess at.  I was fortunate to participate in individual and familial triumphs that provided incredible joy.  The experience was a true cornucopia of life lessons and spiritual growth.  

Earlier this month I was released from the bishopric.  People don't know whether to tell you congratulations or not with something like that.  In my heart I felt that I had provided the service in that calling that the Lord needed of me.  I learned many lessons and gained a better understanding of myself and the many things I need to do better.  We all have so far to go, and I gained an appreciation of that fact for me, personally, while I served in the bishopric.  

Our stake president asked me and Brenna to bear our testimonies on the Sunday I was released.  I don't remember much of what I said, but I do remember some of my thoughts.

While serving in the bishopric I saw and heard things that truly broke my heart.  But I also experienced things that brought incredible joy into my life.  And I experienced all emotions in between.  I had personal conversations with so many people--people I never would have made the opportunity to get to know if not for the calling which I held.  I found that I loved conversing with people about the things that were most important to them, and above all I learned that when it comes down to it, people just want . . . to be loved.  And that is what Christ provides for us all--love.  The Atonement is an act of perfect love and enables us to spread the love of Christ to all.  We can love and serve, and if we love and serve, eventually the Father's plan will be carried out.  Love and service coupled with an understanding of our purpose can enable us to achieve amazing things that benefit us as individuals, our families, our neighbors and society in general.  Not surprising that that is how the Father works.

Brenna said some beautiful things and paid me compliments that I don't deserve.  She and the children deserve all the credit in the world for being so faithful and supportive of me as I tried to do what we all believed was right.  I feel that we have been rewarded for the way in which we worked together as a family while I was in the bishopric.  I can't think of anything more precious than having a wife and children who love you.  I believe that is the pinnacle of manhood and achievement.  I hope that I can stay there.

I suppose I should conclude.  I do so by returning to the things I learned while in the bishopric. People deal with struggles we would never guess at.  The power of the human spirit is remarkable.  I love the way Victor Hugo describes it in my favorite book, Les Miserables:

"[T]here are many great deeds done in the small struggles of life.  There is a determined though unseen bravery, which defends itself foot to foot in the darkness against the fatal invasions of necessity and of baseness.  Noble and mysterious triumphs which no eye sees, which no renown rewards, which no flourish of triumph salutes.  Life, misfortunes, isolation, abandonment, poverty, are battlefields which have their heroes; sometimes greater than the illustrious heroes."

Differences or Commonalities?

I am just entering the "war chapters" of Alma in the Book of Mormon.  I started chapter 43 this morning, and I was captivated by the information in the first several verses.  As background, the Zoramites had left the Nephites to join the Lamanites, and the two groups were preparing for war.

Now to quote verses 5 - 7:

And it came to pass that the Lamanites came with their thousands; and they came into the land of Antionum, which is the land of the Zoramites; and a man by the name of Zerahemnah was their leader.

And now, as the Amalekites were of a more wicked and murderous disposition than the Lamanites were, in and of themselves, therefore, Zerahemnah appointed chief captains over the Lamanites, and they were all Amalekites and Zoramites.

Now this he did that he might preserve their hatred towards the Nephites, that he might bring them into subjection to the accomplishment of his designs.

As I thought about these verses I noted that Zerahemnah had made a calculated decision to focus attention on the fringe elements of those he led.  The major portion of his people were assumedly moderate in their stance toward the Nephites, but he had a smaller, what I'm calling fringe element, who were murderously opposed to the Nephites and their way of life.  Consequently, Zerahemnah utilized this fringe element to stir up the people by constantly reminding them of how the Nephites were different and how the Lamanites should hate them.  As a result of the Lamanites being force fed such vitriol, they were persuaded to go to war against the Nephites based on the perception of the Nephites as advocated by the fringe element.  Differences were trumpeted at the expense of any similarities and war ensued.

It seems that such is the case with much of society both in this country and around the world.  The groups can be political, racial or religious, to name a few.  Too often in our society we hear only how and why people people in groups other than the one with which we identify ourselves are different from us.  We hear about disagreements and arguments and how one group is unfair to another.  Soon we begin to believe that people in other groups are very different from us.  We then might ensconce ourselves more firmly within our own subculture and not seek to learn more and look beyond what we have been told by those who are, essentially, fringe elements of society.  We hear from them because commonalities are not interesting--differences are.  What a shame.

I believe there is something larger at work here.  I believe that God has a plan for the people of the earth, and that He loves us and wants us to be happy.  I believe that He considers us all His children and that Christ is His son, who came to make it possible for us to return to our Father.  Consequently, we are all brothers and sisters with one loving Father and a Brother who has done everything for us.   Above all else, we have that in common.

Sadly, there is an opposing force, and he seeks to thwart God's plan by promoting the fringe elements to ensure we don't see our similarities, but only our differences.  In his plan there would be no understanding--only fear and distrust.  How can we love someone we don't understand?  

So, how are we doing in our individual lives?  Republicans?  Democrats?  Whites?  Blacks?  Latinos?  Asians?  Muslims?  Jews?  Christians?  What do we have to say for ourselves?  Can we look past the fringe element promotions to see each other as we are--brothers and sisters?  Admittedly, I have a vast amount of improvement to do here, but I really saw something in those scripture verses I read this morning.  There are opposing forces out there, and they do have different aims for the human race.  Hopefully we can seek to find commonalities with others in our lives so as to enjoy the benefits of being part of God's family, for that is what we are.

Book Report

Just yesterday I finally managed to finish We wish to inform you that tomorrow we will be killed with our families. Yes, that's the title of my latest read. It's about the genocide in Rwanda during the mid-90s. Why would I want to read 350 pages on such an unpleasant subject? To be honest, I've wondered that myself. The author of the book, Philip Gourevitch, apparently wondered the same thing as to why he would research and write such a book. He starts Part I of the book by quoting from Plato in The Republic:

Leontius, the son of Aglaion, was coming up from the Peiraeus, close to the outer side of the north wall, when he saw some dead bodies lying near the executioner, and he felt a desire to look at them, and at the same time felt disgust at the thought, and tried to turn aside. For some time he fought with himself and put his hand over his eyes, but in the end the desire got the better of him, and opening his eyes wide with his fingers he ran forward to the bodies, saying, "There you are, curse you, have your fill of the lovely spectacle."

Initially, he offers that segment of The Republic without additional commentary, but then several pages in he incorporates the passage by addressing the reader:

Like Leontius, the young Athenian in Plato, I presume that you are reading this because you desire a closer look, and that you, too, are properly disturbed by your curiousity. Perhaps, in examining this extremity with me, you hope for some understanding, some insight, some flicker of self-knowledge--a moral, or a lesson, or a clue about how to behave in this world: some such information. I don't discount the possibility, but when it comes to genocide, you already know right from wrong. The best reason I have come up with for looking closely into Rwanda's stories is that ignoring them makes me even more uncomfortable about existence and my place in it. The horror, as horror, interestes me only insofar as a precise memory of te offense is necessary to understand its legacy.

Even before Don Cheadle's Hotel Rwanda was released (side note: I've not been able to bring myself to watch the movie all the way through--I'm too affected by it) I've had an interest in the Rwandan genocide and how such a thing could occur. What makes us hate? How far away is genocide or ethnic cleansing in other parts of the world? Why do so few seem to care or even be aware that such horrible things are a daily part of life for so many on this planet? Gourevitch hits the nail on the head as to explaining my interest. Ignoring such things makes me vastly more uncomfortable than learning of and mentally engaging myself in the utter incomprehensibility and gruesomeness of such events. Is there a way that my increased awareness might serve to somehow lessen future atrocities? Yes, that probably is a very arrogant, American thing to think. But so what? Why not hope that I can do some good in the world?

One thing I do know is that learning of such things has already helped me deal with my own challenges in a much more patient and grateful fashion. For instance, though the experience with Eliza was neither enjoyable nor something I would recommend, I felt that it was but a drop in the bucket compared to the agony and strife that millions upon millions of people in this world live with every day--with no end in sight. Perhaps that is a bad philosophy--others are much worse off, so just be grateful for what you have. Comparisons are generally not the best method for determining how to react to situations in your own life, but they can be instructive in helping one maintain perspective. And such is where I find myself--I have a bit of a different perspective on life now than I did before I started reading this book. And I am grateful for the perspective that has been gained. Can you give a higher compliment to a book?

I will share just one additional passage from the book that struck me particularly. Those who share my LDS faith will likely recognize immediately why it struck me so deeply. In this passage Gourevitch is recounting a conversation he had with Paul Rusesabagina (the main character in Hotel Rwanda) about Paul's actions during the genocide (where he was singularly instrumental in saving numerous lives through his diplomacy, courage and conviction--all while his own life was in as much danger as those he desired to help).

I wanted to know what had made Paul strong--and he couldn't tell me. "I wasn't really strong," he said. "I wasn't. But maybe I used different means that other people didn't want to use." Only later--"when people were talking about that time"--did it occur to him that he had been exceptional. "During the genocide, I didn't know," he told me. "I thought so many people did as I did, because I know that if they'd wanted they could have done so."

Paul believed in free will. He understood his actions during the genocide in the same way that he understood those of others, as choices.

Agency is a powerful force, and we always have that available to us--regardless of our status or situation. Easy for me to say sitting here, but I hope I won't be found wanting when the time comes for me to demonstrate how I choose to use my agency.

The book is devastating in so many respects, but it is also instructional in providing insights to the enduring power of the human spirit and the ability of one or a few to change the lives of many--for good or for bad. We all have that power and that opportunity. Let's not kid ourselves into thinking we don't, and let us be wise in how we employ it.

Hits Close to Home

If to do were as easy as to know what were good to
do, chapels had been churches and poor men's
cottages princes' palaces. It is a good divine that
follows his own instructions: I can easier teach
twenty what were good to be done, than be one of the
twenty to follow mine own teaching.
- William Shakespeare (1564 – 1616)

The Merchant of Venice, Act 1, Scene 2


You ever come across a quote that just hits you right in the heart? This one does so for me. I spend so much of my time learning and gaining knowledge--whether it be purely intellectual, spiritual or whatever. I enjoy gleaning insights from others and recognizing the proper approach to things. I then relish the opportunity to turn around and share knowledge and insights with my children, or anyone with whom I become engaged in philosophical or theoretical discussions. You know, telling the kids about the things they ought to be doing or mentioning to others some incredible insights gained from the scriptures or social commentary du jour.

Then I turn around and remember that though I have compiled so much knowledge regarding how things ought to be done and the proper way to live life, I am far too inconsistent in the application in my own life. I had an email conversation with my sister, Sandra, a few years ago that was a bit along the lines of this subject, and I concluded that the macro aspect of life is flowing along fairly well. I get in trouble with the micro aspects of life. I believe I have an understanding of where I want to go and the framework of how to get there. And, more or less, I am headed in that general direction, but some days are better than others--which is precisely the frustrating piece.

As Shakespeare notes, it's a straightforward process to instruct others on what is good to be done, but the actual doing is not so straightforward. I think in the common vernacular we say someone can talk the talk, but can they walk the walk.

Well, that's it. How are we all doing walking the walk? I certainly must improve. An approach I've been trying recently is to focus on one very specific area for improvement each day. That helps me to not feel overwhelmed with all my foibles at once, but allows me to seek to manage in palatable chunks. I've been very pleased with the results some days, but on days where I blow it, it's all the more devastating! Well, the only course is to keep working at it, eh?

Once again, Shakespeare hits pretty close to home.

Catching Up

Let's see, lots going on over the last several days.

Family

My niece, Rebecca, and her husband, Davis went on a road trip from Provo to Denver last week and stayed with us for a few days while they were here. The kids loved having their oldest cousin in town, and R&D were great with them. In addition, Rebecca is a nurse and knows a lot more than we do about taking care of premies, so it was fun to watch her hold Eliza knowing that Rebecca understood what a journey Eliza had taken to get here. The oldest and youngest grandchildren for my parents. Pretty cool! Come again, soon R&D. We loved having you here!

As an added bonus, with Nelson in town at the Dunfords, we had Tom, Nelson, Curtis, Davis and me all at Wednesday night basketball. Quite the festival! We played hard and had a good time. Davis and Tom can man the point, Nelson and Curtis are supreme at banging in the paint and hauling in the boards, and I just fill in where I can. It was a ball to play with so many family members.

This week Brenna and the kids have gone to Georgia. I took them to the airport Tuesday afternoon, and although Brenna was very nervous about traveling with the four of them, they all did very well. (We did have to have some serious discussions with them beforehand to ensure they wouldn't give Mom any trouble--and they didn't. They know how to rise to the occasion when they need to. Good job guys!) They've been loving Grandma and Grandpa's swimming pool and living the good life with their cousins. It's quiet here, but that brings me to my next topic...

Work

Once again, quarter end close is upon us. I thought I was getting out of the stress of quarter close when I took this new job six months ago. Not so. My job has morphed a bit, and I now have responsibility for reviewing some revenue calculations for multiple deals on a world-wide basis. Very interesting how things can be so different from one area of the world to the next. I delivered the same training to all Regions--US, Latin America, Europe and Asia Pacific, but the quality of submissions has varied drastically from one region to the next. You can really tell which regions believe this aspect of the accounting is important and which don't. I recognize it's a big headache for them, but it's also a key area the auditors look at so we must be thorough and consistent worldwide. It makes for a challenge when I have to send things back to some regions and ask them redo the work.

I know that's boring for most of you to read, but it becomes all-consuming for me for a week to two weeks every three months. Fortunately, I'm able to focus on other things for most of the rest of each quarter.

Church

A couple of things in this category. First, since last Sunday was the fifth Sunday, the Bishop presented a lesson on finances to all the adults. I wish I could report to you on how it went, but instead of attending his class, the Bishop asked me to present the same topic to the youth. In order to understand the magnitude of that request, please understand that we have around 30 active youth, and about 20 of those are young men. Plenty of Deacons and Priests. So, the audience was diverse in their attention span, interest level and ability to comprehend. We spent a very interesting 50 minutes together to say the least. I knew with such a topic that I couldn't reasonably expect to keep their attention on a consistent basis, but I also knew that various aspects of the lesson would be interesting and would stick with some of the youth. So I really made an effort to be patient with all the whispering and side conversations, and it turned out pretty well. Much of what we discussed was new information even to the oldest of the youth. We discussed interest and mortgages very briefly, and it was quite remarkable to see the shock register on some of their faces when I mentioned how much interest they could expect to pay on a 30-year 250K mortgage. Rude awakening. I also rattled them with my old school sayings, such as "he's a loose cannon," and "toot your own horn." It was funny to see the blank stares and realize they had no idea what I meant when I said those things. Ah, the generation gap--it's getting wider for me.

The second item is one I'm quite enthused about. We have had a huge influx of new families in our ward over the past two to three months. (Side bar: most of these families are quite young, and Brenna and I are in the unfamiliar position of starting to feel we are in the middle-aged group in our ward. When we moved in six years ago, we were far and away on the young side of the ward--probably about the youngest family, in fact. Now, we are approaching median age, I would say. Pretty amazing!)

Anyway, the Bishop had a get together at his home on Monday night and invited the new families as well as a few long-term members. While there I was able to chat for a while with Ryan Gunderson, who is the owner of the Riches For Good blog at richesforgood.blogspot.com.

I have briefly mentioned in the past that I would like to get more involved in the world of microcredit and the like. Well, Ryan has a decided interest in that topic, and we're already making plans to get me more involved. Call it an effort to do something larger with my life. At one point, I thought I would get a job that would make a real difference in the world. Well, not to disparage my current job, but let's just say it's not the idealist's dream. So, why not make it a hobby and a passion. I'll keep you updated how things develop, but I really hope to be able to jump in with both feet now that I have someone around who can show me the ropes, so to speak.

I'm looking forward to it.

Whirlwind Weekend

I woke up at 4AM Saturday, gave Brenna a quick kiss, ate a quick bowl of cereal (gotta have my breakfast!), loaded my two small carry-ons into Roscoe and headed for the airport. Uneventful drive--I took I-25 to I-270 to I-70 to Pena Blvd and Pike's Peak parking lot. I listened to the NPR classical music station all the way. Parked at Pike's Peak and hopped on the shuttle bus just as it was about to leave the parking lot. One of life's little pleasures--catching the bus at just the right time!

By 5:10 I was standing in a short security line, listening to my iPod and feeling good about things. I noticed the "Clear" security lanes with the flyclear.com website being advertised. I never saw anyone actually use the Clear lane, but I thought what a time saver it would be if you traveled frequently. Then I thought, if you traveled that frequently you're probably already an elite member of some airline and you're allowed to use the security lane for "important" travelers anyway. So, I'm not sure how many people actually use Clear. Anyone have experience?

At any rate, I rumbled right on through security--even was waived to a completely open x-ray line that other travelers had simply overlooked. You just can't beat that. I headed down the escalator (side note: why are we Americans so useless at escalator etiquette? Stand on the right, walk on the left--Europeans do this flawlessly. But not the States. Oh no, we must stand so that we take up as much of the escalator width as possible ensuring that someone who is in a hurry or simply doesn't like to perpetuate the inactive culture must wait in an exasperated heap until the escalator arrives at its destination. Yes, I spend too much time worrying about these things.) and waited for the train to take me to Terminal C. Jaunty little tune accompanying the arrival and departure of the train. Far better than the tune they used to have.

I got to my gate and found a spot to sit where I could read the morning paper and pass the 20 minutes or so until boarding. Leisurely review of the sports page (with an all-too-brief recap of the unbelievable Turkey/Croatia Euro 2008 quarterfinal game--stunning in every respect) with a bit of dabbling at the Main Section and a half-hearted attempt at the crossword. Plane boarding soon began, and I settled into my seat by the window and promptly learned there were mechanical problems and we were delayed 1/2 hour or so. Not a big deal, but seriously. This was a 6:10 AM flight. It's not like the plane had just arrived from somewhere else and been jostled for its efforts. No, this plane had been sitting overnight--shouldn't they have figured out the mechanical problem at that point? Again, an extremely minor inconvenience, but I just don't understand how it works.

Flight was completely uneventful--I slept right through it, waking up with only a slight kink in my neck. Not bad for a 70 or so minute snooze. Arrived in SLC and headed for the exit all the while hopefully scanning the faces for someone I might recognize. Am I the only one who does that? I mean, I've just arrived back "home," and I know plenty of Utahns, so I'm bound to run into an old friend or acquaintance sometime in the SLC airport, right? Well, nothing of the kind this time around--just out to passenger pick up after calling mom on the cell. Mom and Dad were there in the F250 in short order and off we went. I-215 to Redwood Road, then up Winchester to 7th West and home. Wow. The place gets more amazing every time I see it--the yard had been inundated with larkspur, and it was beautiful. So much shade from the trees, with quail and hummingbirds providing some animal life to the nature scene. Well done, mom and dad, for keeping your little oasis going.

Ron and Jeanne were there though Erin, Matthew and Jordan had opted to stay in Provo with Rebecca and Davis. I had to work very hard to not be offended! We all enjoyed some lovely banter over a breakfast of German Pancakes, for which mom had misplaced her recipe. When was the last time my mom did that? I ran through the ingredients with her, and Jeanne told her what temp to cook it at and we were good to go. Mom whipped it up and we were eating like kings with light syrup only 20 minutes later.

Jeanne then had to make a run to the store to find some black nylons and she went out with attitude (wearing a t-shirt and skirt and firmly declaring that she didn't care if it looked silly). Good for her, I say!

Ron and I had a thoroughly enjoyable chat about Euro 2008--great, great soccer for those who haven't been following and soon enough it was time for Ron & Jeanne to head down to Highland/Alpine to help finish setting up for the reception. I retired to the basement to gather my thoughts and try to write something meaningful in a card for Heidi and Isaac. What a fine pair they are, and how happy I am for them and their marriage.

As a guy I have taken the liberty of not buying wedding gifts. Basically, I'm just too lazy, but I also enjoy simply writing a check knowing that the couple will be able to do whatever they choose with the money. So, skewer me for it if you like, but I just show up to weddings with a card and a check and it's worked well for me. I am grateful for those people, though, who do go to the extra effort of making the trip to the store and purchasing something tangible. It would be tough as newlyweds to have to go out and buy everything you needed--could be fun, but that would be a lot of shopping!

Well, I penned a note in the card, sealed it up and put it with my suit. I handed my iPod over to Dad so he could watch a Foghorn Leghorn cartoon, and that made me smile. What cool technology we have, and here I am years later enjoying Foghorn Leghorn and thinking of my dad when I do. I had to let him see it on the iPod! I then sat in the red room and leafed through a photo album my mom has kept of my life. Quite remarkable to look back on pictures of my son at one year and see how much my niece Lauren's son, Barrett, looks like him. Barrett has bit more heft going for him (all of our children have been exceedingly lean), but their facial features have remarkable similarities. Loved seeing my grade school pictures and looking at pictures of some of the classes I was in--Mr. Gray, fifth grade with Jeremy Taeoalii, Scott Burbidge, Steve Rasband, Dane Reid and others--including the heartthrob Heidi Jensen, though none of the boys wanted to admit it. I also saw a picture of a simply incredible basketball team--maybe third grade or so--Dave Hooper, Jeremy Taeoalii, Chad Christensen, me, Christian Matsumori, Scott Hamblin and Tyler Bloxham--coached by Bob Hooper and Mike Christensen. Cool! What good times we had.

Anyhow, what a flood of memories. Thanks, mom, for keeping all of that stuff together for me. Aren't good parents the greatest blessing in the world?

I soon had to get up and don my suit. We hopped in mom and dad's car and headed to Linda's to pick her up. Lovely strawberries in the Townes front yard. I wish ours were doing so well, but the birds seem to be getting at ours--similar problem voiced by my dad.

Linda and I settled into the backseat and carried on a lovely conversation the entire trip down to the Mt Timpanogos temple. I don't have a clue what all the topics of conversation were, but I do recall there was a lot of laughter, cheer and good times. I also specifically recall a reference to Cumet de Fois (Kewmit de Fwog) that threw Linda for a loop. Not sure why it was so funny to us, but that is the nature of a brother/sister relationship. Also, the point that I have not lived in Utah for almost 10 years now was pointedly driven home by my shock at the number of chapels seen during the section of the drive from I-15 to the temple. Seriously, at one point I thought there were more chapels than houses. The Mormon contingent (I threw that word in here just for Paul Jensen if he's reading!) of the population in that area is something to behold. Whew!

At length we arrived at the temple and headed for the sealing room. So good to see Kelsey, Davis, Rebecca, and other family members. Heidi and Isaac arrived in the sealing room several minutes after the rest of us, and they looked fantastic. What a beautiful bride was my niece. I am so proud of her for all that she is and will be. I'm certain this couple is headed for great things. I won't go into much detail about the ceremony, but suffice to say that the sealer, who was also the temple president, did a simply beautiful job of bringing in the spirit and ensuring we all understood the beauty and importance of marriage. Tears came to my eyes as I contemplated my own family and pondered how my life and priorities have changed in the 11 years Brenna and I have been married. Such a wonderful thing to be reminded of the reality and grandeur of the eternal family. Thanks to Heidi and Isaac for the invite and the opportunity to be involved in their wedding and to be reminded of my own at the same time. I love going to temple weddings--they are so beautifully simple.

Lots of pictures, lots of heat and plenty more laughs as we were joined outside the temple by Erin, Matthew and Jordan. We wish Sara and Derek had been able to be there as well, but we're glad they are where they are--after all, the worth of souls is great in the sight of God and nothing can take precedence over sharing the gospel when the time comes.

Another brief anecdote from childhood upon which Linda and I reminisced a bit. When Beth and Linda were still home and I was a pre-teen they enjoyed calling me Gomer. I guess it was kind of the insult du jour in high school those days (or maybe just for the two of them). Anyhow, one day they were folding laundry and taking the stacks to the appropriate rooms and Beth pointed to my stack of laundry and asked Linda, "Is this Gomer's pile?" They both burst out laughing hysterically, and though used to being called Gomer, the added amusement gained from the pile appendage was a mystery to me. After wiping tears of laughter from their eyes they were actually kind enough to inform me of the origins of Gomer and his last name being Pyle. Beth had made a funny without meaning to, and it tickled them to no end. So, there you have it--a brief glimpse into the arduous life I lived as the younger brother of five sisters! ;-)

Well, on to the wedding dinner and reception. They were both held at Isaac's grandfather's house in Highland (or was it Alpine--I'm not straight on that). The property was great--a creek running through the back, plenty of green lawn, trees and flowers. There was also a well situated basketball hoop, but I maintained a slight sense of decorum and managed to control the urge to find a ball. Nelson, Carmen, Jordan, Trent, Ed, Riley and Lennon were soon in the fold along with the previously mentioned family members. Feasting, speechifying, hysterical laughing over a scene from the animated "Babar the Elephant" movie and many other experiences too numerous to mention. I soaked it all in and enjoyed every moment. Davis and Rebecca even made plans to come to Denver this week for a little vacation. Whoopee! More family whose company we can enjoy.

Well, we finally had to make an end and I headed home in the Townes' van with Trent also included. Trent is now a hi-up specialist. This means that he washes windows on tall buildings. We all liked the idea of having a title like hi-up specialist and we eagerly await reports from Trent to know how working with such a lofty title plays out in actuality.

I don't really recall what time they dropped me off at mom and dad's, but it wasn't too late. Mom asked if I needed any food, to which I responded in the negative. Heidi and Isaac had provided a sumptuous feast that was still keeping me going. I chatted with mom and dad for a bit, but they were soon ready for bed. I stayed up just a bit longer to leaf through the albums some more, and then I retired to the blue room--my room growing up--for a night's rest. I no longer sleep with the door closed completely because I am no longer used to sleeping in the pitch dark. In high school my friends and I called my room the dungeon because there are no windows and when the light is turned off and the door is closed you can't see your own hand in front of your face. Well, I'm no longer conditioned for that so the door was left open for "visionary" purposes. I would have perished at such a thought when I was in high school.

My dad's footsteps on the stairs woke me at 6 the next morning just as planned. A quick breakfast and then back to the airport for the return flight home. The return flight had the added bonus of Nelson and Carmen being aboard as well. We hung out at the gate, I slept on the flight and then we took the bus back to Pike's Peak lot where we found Roscoe ready and waiting. The old boy got us home in short order where I was reunited with those I love most! A quick change into my suit (I wore shorts and a short-sleeve shirt on the plane) and then off to church.

Yes, a whirlwind weekend that was enjoyable in every sense of the word. Thank you, dear family, for the love we share. Thank you, Heidi and Isaac, for getting married and continuing to set an example that my children can look up to. It's a good life!

Light

I get to sit in on the Teachers' Quorum lessons at church. We have 10 or so Teachers in our ward, and they're a pretty good gang. Often, they will take the conversation and run with it, and it can be a chore to bring them back around to the topic of the lesson, but yesterday the instructor, Brother Call, captured their attention pretty well. He did so by being excited about the topic and telling them that the lesson was about a fascinating concept and that really engaged his mind and would be very interesting to the boys. His approach made it clear that he loved the subject he was about to present.

I remember when I was 17 or so and sitting in Priests' Quorum. Bishop Graves would open the Book of Mormon and be so enthusiastic about the stories it contained that I just couldn't help but get excited about the book myself. There is definitely something to be said for the way in which a lesson is approached. When the instructor loves and has personally invested in the subject the students are more likely to take it seriously and listen.

With those thoughts as a backdrop, Bro Call delved into the lesson and taught from the scriptures. Although the Teachers did have their off-topic moments, for the most part they were fully invested in the lesson--eager to look up scriptures and asking and answering intelligent questions. It was one of those good days where gospel knowledge expanded and testimonies grew.

The topic of the lesson was light. Many avenues were explored, but the predominant aspect on which I focused was light being of God and it is truth. The Doctrine & Covenants was utilized extensively--particularly sections 76 and 88. As the discussion carried on, my mind turned to the scripture about the light of the body being the eye. I looked it up subsequently and it can be found in both Matthew 6 and 3 Nephi 13. It clicked in my mind that a person's countenance is directly related to the light that is in their eyes. I recall so often sitting on the stand with Bishop Newman, and he would point out that someone's countenance seemed down or off from where it usually was. He would subsequently talk to them and learn of something amiss or that they needed help in a particular area. I loved being able to see how the Spirit can work in people's lives--either through someone else's help or through the person helping him/herself. And so often help from others can come because it shows in our countenances.

So, I loved putting those experiences together with the scriptures we discussed yesterday and recognizing that the light in our eyes is directly related to how much of God we have in our life and people can tell that by our countenance. The Spirit is a powerful teacher and a powerful guide. This brief post does no justice to the lesson or to the depth of the topic, but it was a small takeaway that was just an "aha" moment for me, and I appreciate those!

Big Weekend

This is one of those weekends we will always remember at our house. On Saturday Savannah was baptized and Eliza was blessed. What a great day! Little Eliza has come so far so fast that it all is just a bit incredible to think that we're doing regular baby things with her now. And Savannah was so pleased to be able to share her amazing day with her little sister.

The three girls looking good!

This picture of Eliza reminds me a lot of Madison when she was getting blessed. It's fun to be able to look back and have those memories. After having seen Savannah and Madison develop their personalities I am very eager to see what Eliza will be like. My guess is she will have a fighting spirit but be very insightful as to others emotions and needs. Time will tell. I just love being a dad and seeing these wonderful people become who they are.

The oldest and the youngest. It's very enjoyable to see how much the older children love holding Eliza and how cautious they are with her. She does lend a certain air of calm at times!

The whole gang! What a beautiful day, and what fun we had! Thanks to our family who traveled to be with us, and thanks to our wonderful friends who participated. I really felt the strength of the great men with whom I stood in those two circles. I can't think of another feeling to compare it with, but I won't forget it.

How to combat unhappy feelings

Madison has really charmed us with this song she learned in Cherub Choir. She goes once a week to a large Christian church in the area with loads of other children her age and they have a great time singing songs about Jesus, playing games and the like. One day she came home singing this song, and she now frequently reminds us to apply its message (generally as a result of something she has done, and often forgetting to apply its message herself). Anyway, it's a great song, and this was the best version we could get from her with the camera rolling.

If somebody makes me mad,
Or somebody makes me sad,
I stop and pray and Jesus makes me glad!

FHE

This video was taken a couple of weeks before Eliza came home, and I've just remembered to post it. There is actually another video about five minutes long that started at the beginning of the lesson. It was hilarious, but it's too big to post here, and I'm too lazy to figure out how to parse it. I wish it were easier to share though, because it is a microcosm for all FHE lessons. Very good times! So, if you know what FHE stands for and you've battled through it with small children, watch, enjoy and take heart. They don't just ignore their parents, they also ignore each other!

Freedom requires religion

I've spent a little time reading comments and blogs regarding Mitt Romney's speech this morning. Let me start by saying that when he finished I turned to my wife and said, "I would be happy to hear that speech from any candidate." As a person of faith, I guess that is easy for me to say. Obviously his speech was very friendly to the religiously-minded and to those who like the idea of religion and faith playing a more prominent role in our society--not government, but society.

What has struck me is the number of individuals commenting or blogging who are concerned or outright threatened by Mitt's statement, "Freedom requires religion." That quote is taken from part of a larger statement--"Freedom requires religion, just as religion requires freedom. Freedom opens the windows of the soul so that man can discover his most profound beliefs and commune with God. Freedom and religion endure together, or perish alone."

Many of the opinions I have seen expressed in the public forum indicate Mitt's statement completely devalues atheists or others who don't practice religion. They make him out to be a dangerous theocrat and/or lunatic who will only advance the cause of the religious right and disregard all others. A few examples from posters at CNN.com:

"Freedom requires religion? Grrrr.....So, the faithless don't deserve freedom?"

"True freedom is freedom from religion. Freedom from believing in magical fairy tales with a happy ending and instead pursuing where we came from without mysticism."

"This guy is the same man as what we already have. Open your eyes! We need someone who will acknowledge that you can believe what you want but who won't push their own view upon us. I AM an atheist but yet I have to listen to someone like Mitt tell me that it's wrong? I find that wrong!"

"'Freedom requires religion.' What a stupid statement. If this man gets elected we can expect more of the same stupidity in the White House that we have now. Just as religion is not required to live a fair and just existence, nor is it required for anything else."

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In my mind these individuals have incorrectly interpreted the point Mitt was making. I don't believe Mitt was referring to individuals. Rather, I believe he was referring to society. Individuals absolutely have the right to choose whether to believe in God and/or hold to the tenets of a religion. If certain individuals choose the path of atheism or of abstaining from organized religion then that is their right, and they should be respected in that right. However, to believe that a free society could operate effectively without religion is folly. Freedom does, indeed, require religion. To cite one example the communist USSR pursued a policy of religious intolerance, and we can all agree that freedom is not one of the adjectives that would be used to describe that society.

The point is that people have to be allowed the right to choose whether religion matters to them, and if it does, they need to be able to choose which religion they prefer to follow. That would include the ability to choose no religion at all. A truly free society--like ours--allows, even encourages, people to make that choice. If religion were not allowed or were discouraged in this country, then we would not be free. The same can be said if religion is forced--such action would destroy freedom.

I believe Mitt understands these things. Freedom requires religion because without that choice it is impossible to say that all members of society are truly free to follow their consciences. So, I applaud Mitt's statement. Perhaps it would have been more palatable if Mitt had said, "Freedom requires religion as well as the opportunity to be unreligious." However, that statement is clunky and doesn't fit with the rest of his speech. The speech was focused on faith and its role in American life. To suddenly turn and throw a sop to the atheists would have been pandering at its worst and would have diluted his message of religious tolerance. A broad mind would accept that religious tolerance as espoused in Mitt's speech includes not only acceptance of many different faiths, but also of those who have no religious faith. To declare otherwise is to simply demonstrate a person's own biases and pre-conceived notions.

It all reminds me of one of my favorite scenes from Dead Poet's Society. Robin Williams takes his students to the courtyard, selects a few and encourages them to go into the middle of the courtyard and do something. Soon, they find themselves marching in unison with the remaining students clapping the time of the march. Williams essentially points out they all fell victims to group think and were willing to be followers rather than leaders and individuals. So, the students then take great pleasure in walking around the courtyard in all sorts bizarre manners. One student, however, simply stands and observes. When Williams asks why, the student responds that he is exercising the right not to walk. Williams commends him by saying that his decision only further serves to illustrate the point.

I believe that is what we can learn from Mitt's speech if we choose to take the broader perspective. Freedom is not all marching in time with one religious dogma. It is having numerous religions--the gait of some of which may be bizarre. Freedom also enables individuals to choose to not participate in religion at all. But it would never force an individual into one camp or the other. A free society absolutely requires religion, but it most certainly does not require everyone to be religious.

Facebook

Within the last couple of weeks I have set up my own Facebook page and found myself interacting with family much more frequently than in the past. I look forward to going on the page and seeing what is happening in the lives of those I love.

I have also enjoyed searching on names of friends I've lost touch with. What a great way to keep in touch. It's non-invasive and and easy. I know I sound completely sophomoric, but I suppose that's basically my state when it comes to utilizing the internet for personal purposes. Anyway, I've been so pleased with the ease and enjoyment of Facebook that it turned my thoughts to my long-neglected blog. Who knows whether I will carve out the time to be more consistent with this blog, but for now I have a desire to write.

So, a couple of things.

First, and most important, today was a bit of a rough day. This past week has been quarter-end close, which means that I worked about 70 hours Mon - Fri. For many people that is probably a normal routine, but for me it is not. I dread these couple of weeks every quarter, and the stress of quarter close generally seems to get the better of me. Couple that with the fact that Brenna is essentially on bed rest currently, and things are stressful in the two dominant portions of my life--family and work. Savannah, Hunter and Madison often are wonderful children, but with their mom not really able to get off the couch and with their dad not home at all during the week, it was difficult for them as well. Despite the amazing help from numerous dear friends in our ward, the house was in a general state of disrepair this morning, and there were many household tasks to be done.

In an effort to cut this entry a bit short, I will sum up by saying that I became very frustrated today and let my anger spill over into the way I spoke to my children. I was unnecessarily loud and harsh. I let my temper get the better of me, and my children had to put up with their dad verbally expressing his displeasure.

Fortunately, I went to Priesthood session this evening, and, as usual, President Hinckley was the concluding speaker. His surprise topic was anger. He admonished the brethren and encouraged us to be in control of our emotions--for the good of those around us and ourselves. He may as well have been speaking directly to me. I came home with a renewed desire to always stay in control and speak kind words. President Hinckley rightly pointed out that the small frustrations that crop up simply aren't worth the long-term ramifications of anger. He also rebutted any possible reference to Christ's anger when cleansing the temple. He indicated the cleansing of the temple was a rebuke rather than an uncontrolled outburst of anger. I suppose right-thinking people could debate that, but I believe President Hinckley is correct. Consequently, I need to improve (as if I didn't already know). My goal is to take it to heart and apply the gospel more fully. Temper and sarcasm have always been regrettable aspects of my personality. But the beautiful thing about the gospel and the atonement is that it allows, in fact it requires, people to change. It always offers hope!

Now that I think about it, I guess I'll stop there for tonight. The other topic I was going to mention is too superficial to include here after what I have written above. I'll come back to it in the future.

Being a husband and dad is the greatest thing in the world. I pray that the Father will work with me to help me become better in both areas.